Thankful Thanksgiving but a crappy week

We once again had a relaxing time in Sunriver with my family, followed by an afternoon of games and food with Bob's family. I don't mean to sound like a brat because I have so much to be thankful for, but I've just been feeling a bit down this week. For every thing that makes me happy, there is something to make me sad and once again I'm having the feeling of what can I do to make a difference. Everyday it is the same. Sure I recycle, I sit on committees, I donate to worthy causes, but in the end what have I changed? There are still kids that can't read, people starving, women being raped, drugs being made, wars being fought. Why don't people want to help? Why don't people want change?

Let's start with the most recent item. I did not get the regional position I applied for, it went to an overachieving male architect/attorney, yes both. I don't even know how that is possible since one of the requirements was to be licensed less than 10 years! So maybe my application was a joke. Am I? What do I really know?

Second, I am grateful to be employed. This is a very rough time for architects and I know some that are still out of work, so I hate to say that I am unhappy at my job. I don't trust the people I work with, I cannot call them friends and I don't think they actually care about me either. This week I have been invisible. I am no longer included in meetings, no one asks me to work or help them with something and no one seems to care what I am working on. So I have to wonder if my end is near. Which in case you are wondering, is just about the crappiest thing to feel.

Ah the weight of the world, does no one else feel it? How do you bare it?