At Peace

Some days I find myself smiling in the car, whether it be at a realization about where I am in life or singing along with a song and some days the same songs make me overly emotional. Today was an emotional realization. The song was 'We are Young', which I love the beginning lines, I think they are very clever, and then the lyrics say, 'and if by the time the bar closes, you feel like falling down, I'll carry you home.' I have a great sense of peace knowing that the who that will carry me home is the only person I would want carrying me home. Then he says, 'Tonight we are young, let's set the world on fire, we can burn brighter than the sun.' And I realize a couple of things, we aren't that young any more, but those nights we get at the bar - be them few and far between, we feel young, like we can conquer the world again, we can still set the world on fire, but our passions in life have changed, what are we setting it on fire for, it isn't about just us. And I'm okay with that. I still want to set the world on fire, but I only need to burn brighter than the sun occassionally.  You know the 'little ditty 'bout Jack and Diane, two American kids...' and I think, 'Wow, we're not kids anymore, I can't hold on to 16, wait, why would I want to?' The place I'm at now is great, minus the sleep deprived nights and sticking to a budget, the other big things I worry about are getting to work on time and my love hate relationship with the Medela Pump. So maybe it is okay to be emotional when I hear certain songs, because I'm not depressed, I'm actually quite happy. so what if my eyes leak a little, it must be part of the mommy gene.